Emotional Mashup
by blackindiaink
Summary: Set just after the ICCA's Beca is having a little angst over her decision to be with Jesse. Maybe because there's someone else in the picture. A certain redhead might just might have the solo in her emotional mash-up.
1. Chapter 1

A capella was hard. Not that she had ever thought about it before but now that she was pretty entrenched in A ca-land she could admit how much she had underestimated it's worth. She would never say it when there were witnesses present but it had given her some things she would have never even known she had wanted; a place to belong, friends who didn't grow stubble, and a chance to be creative musically in a way she had never imagined.

She looked around the bus at her girls. They were all sitting casually amongst the guys. The Treble Makers and Bellas were intermingling quite happily even in light of their 1 - 2 finish. Beca chuckled as she watched Fat Amy bounce from one conversation to the next, always having something random and oddly hilarious to add. At the moment she seemed to be demonstrating some dance move that involved touching her toes to her face, which made her turn out looking something like a human pretzel on ecstasy.

She shook her head and returned to her somewhat less fascinating inner monologue. Winning the ICCA finals was a rush and she had known as soon as they had been half way through the number that they were going to end up on top. She could read it in the faces of every person watching. All the judges had stopped looking down at their score sheets and were enraptured by the Bella's unexpected performance.

They had broken out of the mold that had been uncomfortably forced on them and it had enabled each girl to shine in their own way. Once Aubry had loosened up, literally letting her hair down, everyone had relaxed into their own natural role in the group, making their cohesion obvious. Singing as a ensemble transformed from something slightly awkward to something extraordinarily fun in the weeks leading up to the competition.

They'd flown home the morning after their victory and now it was just a matter of making it back to campus from the airport. Looking back Beca was just happy that they had all landed in one piece after Fat Amy had locked herself and Benji in the tiny airplane bathroom. She didn't even want to think about the sounds that had emanated from that tiny cubicle of a room. Not to mention that the flight attendant had given up on wrangling the whole group thirty minutes after the refreshments were handed out.

The ruckus was however useful in distracting her from her somewhat dour thoughts. She had spent the entire flight trying to figure out why the hell she was feeling off after such an emotional high. Truthfully, she had never been that in touch with her feelings. Her MO was to wall them up behind a facade of bravado and uninterested coolness but in the last few months she had opened up a little allowing doubts to cloud her usually quick thought process.

The year had taken her to some very interesting places so far. There wasn't much she could complain about and no reason for her to feel like she did. She rooted through the her recent memories to find the source of her discontent. Now, it seemed that deep introspection was kind of dangerous for her. She glanced up at Jesse. The forgone conclusion that had seemed so right ten hours ago now seemed uncomfortable. He slept beside her, gently resting an arm over her shoulder while they both reclined against the side of the bus. She winced and pulled away, letting his arm fall between them. When he didn't stir she sighed in relief and looked down the length of the bus.

She caught Aubry's eye. Her old nemesis turned friend smiled thinly and sent her a questioning look. Obviously, Aubry had seen her dislodge Jesse's arm.. She might not be as self obsessed as Beca had previously thought but thankfully she had spent so much time hating the change that Beca represented that she didn't know her well enough to ascertain that there were deeper reasons for it.

Chloe however could see right through her. From the beginning it had been clear that they had an inexplicable chemistry. A way of interacting that Beca refused to analyze out of fear. Her gaze strayed from Aubry to Chloe whose eyes were fixed on fleeting scenery outside the vehicle. She had turned her body away from everyone else and looked lost in thought. Her ear buds and transfixed expression were as clear as a "do not disturb" sign.

Beca looked back at Jesse, focusing on his face. He was cute, charming (in an almost annoying sort of way), and sweet. Why couldn't she feel it, the spark. It just didn't click. She had bought into the romantic ending. Girl gets boy and they live happily ever after... at least until the sequel and it's required suckiness. Her shoulders slumped. He was everything described in the movies that he had gone through great pains to make her watch but maybe she had expected too much. That kiss at the end of the competition wandered into her mind. It was great on paper. Climactic moment, big romantic gesture, and all following the most exciting experience of her life. When their lips had met she had expected fireworks or at least a weak ass sparkler. Apparently, it didn't have the magic, at least not for her.

Now she was at a loss. Part of her wondered if she should just tell him how she was feeling and let them both get out of danger while they could still salvage some sort of friendship but the competing voice in her head couldn't help but wonder if she wasn't being a bit hasty. They had spent a lot of time dancing around this and what if her fear of getting close was still lingering like the remnants of that burrito that Bumper had plastered all over Fat Amy. No, she owed it to them both to at least explore this. She immediately felt better. Sometimes making a decision was satisfying in itself.

Her eyes strayed to Chloe again. Her hair flowed down loose and free, unlike past trips where it had been harshly restrained in a tight bun to accompany the stodgy uniform that the Bella's had worn for so long. She looked relaxed but maybe a little tired, her legs were crossed and angled toward the window, the foot on top bobbing absently. Ever since they had first met at the activities fair she had found herself drawn to Chloe, her awareness always seemed to focus on the red hair, bright eyes, and shining aura even in a group.

The shower incident had been a breakthrough of sorts for Beca. She had connected with Chloe on a level that she had never experienced before. It was an amazing feeling and it filled her up, making her forget about her reluctance to let people see her. Chloe had a sort of calm, quirky confidence that immediately relaxed her and naturally lowered her walls. She enjoyed being with her and it was rarely awkward on an emotional level.

She found herself willing Chloe's eyes to turn on her. She wanted and needed to see their clarity. In a weird way it might reinforce her decision to give dating Jesse a shot. The bus came to a stop in the parking lot of the music building. She was surprised that she had missed the inevitable buzz that accompanied their arrival on the Barden campus.

Then it happened, their eyes met. Just as Chloe was taking her ear buds out, their eyes snapped onto each other like opposite poles. Without realizing it she was smiling into the shining blue eyes. She received a half-luster smile in return that didn't reach the blue orbs. Beca swallowed a hard lump that formed in her throat. Her smile faltered and she felt the need to say something that she couldn't fathom.

All the doubt returned,crashing on her like bricks. Her stomach turned sour suddenly and she lost her mental balance when Chloe looked away to retrieve her bag from the floor of the bus. Jesse stirred and opened his eyes. He touched her arm affectionately and smiled when she turned to him.

"Hey, you okay," he asked.

She nodded. "Yeah," she replied quietly.

An alkaline taste appeared on her tongue and panic gripped her but she stuffed it down and stood up to follow Jesse off the bus. Why did she feel like she was missing the plot? She concentrated on getting down the stairs in one piece and breathed easy as her feet hit asphalt, first one then the other. She searched for Chloe without realizing that she was literally ignoring Jesse talking to her.

"Beca?" He tapped her arm playfully. "Did you hear me?"

"Huh?" She tuned in despite being preoccupied.

He laughed nervously. "I've been talking to you for like thirty seconds but you were spacing out." He waved his hand in front of her face. "Are you that tired?"

"Oh, yeah... sorry. I was just..." She fiddled with the strap to her messenger bag and tried to focus on giving an acceptable answer. "Yeah, I'm exhausted. I actually think I'm going to head to my room and get some sleep." She ducked her head and tried unsuccessfully to seem less awkward.

"Oh," he said. His eyebrow raised and confusion colored his face. "Okay, well, I'll walk you there." He reached for her hand and grasped her cold fingers.

She smiled back at him. "You don't have to. It's in the opposite direction from your dorm and the walk will clear my head." She shuffled her feet. "All the post kicking your ass cobwebs, ya know." She gestured lamely, trying to lighten the interaction.

He stepped back, considering her words and body language. He was mystified at what could have happened between yesterday and today to make her seem so awkward around him. If there was one thing he had learned from dealing with Beca was that not only could you not lead her to water, you couldn't make her talk to you if she didn't want to. Anyway, he was tired and didn't think he was up to wading through her mixed signals.

"Okay, well... I guess I will talk to you tomorrow." He stepped towards her and placed a kiss on her forehead. "Text me when you get to your room so I know you're safe." He smiled and turned to walk toward his dorm.

She watched him go and lamented her inability to control her emotional roller coaster, then made her way to her dorm and climbed the stairs to the third floor. He key scraped the lock as she shoved it in and turned the knob. The room was dark and deserted, perfect. The bag slid from her shoulder to the floor beside her desk. She collapsed onto the bed and tried to succumb to the aching desire to rest but her mind would not settle. Nearly incoherent thoughts raced through, taking shape behind her closed eyes. Nevertheless, she eventually dozed off but woke nearly thirty minutes later to the sound of someone quietly knocking on her door.

She jolted awake, unaware of what had woken her until she heard the soft tap again. Her eyes rolled as she sat up and forced herself to her feet. When she opened the door she was already severely annoyed at being disturbed but when she saw Jesse standing there with a worried expression she nearly exploded.

"Hey," he said, "You didn't text me so I got worried"

She closed her eyes and focused on reigning her temper. "Yeah, I forgot," she sighed, "And anyway you didn't have to come all the way over here" She grimaced as his face fell. Obviously, there might be a bit more to his showing up at her door but she refused to acknowledge it right now. She didn't mean to reject his gesture so outright but she also didn't want to encourage the behavior. "You should have just called."

"I did" he said, "three times."

"I'm sorry," she gestured into her room, "I must still have it on silent from the bus."

"That's okay," he replied, "Can I come in?"

She leaned on the door frame. "Not right now, Jesse. I am literally exhausted and I'm so not going to be good company right now."

"Oh, okay," he replied, "Well, just call me tomorrow when you feel like it." He turned to go but paused and then turned back to face her. Gently he rested a hand on her face and leaned in. The kiss was light and quick. He smiled slightly. "Goodnight"

He was down the hall and to the stairwell before she shut the door. His lips felt foreign, like they didn't belong on her skin. They had left a mark of unease that lingered minutes after. She returned to her bed and got under the covers. Her phone lay on top of the comforter beside her and she picked it up and checked her notifications.

There were the three missed calls from Jesse but just under his name was another; Chloe. She had one voice mail and since she knew that Jesse didn't leave voice mails, it had to be from Chloe. Part of her wanted to save it for later, to wait until tomorrow when everything would be more clear. That part was shouted down by her curiosity and unnamed desire.

She tapped the screen and put the phone to her ear. After getting through the requisite automated voice mail message telling her what she already knew she heard Chloe's voice. A small smile captured her lips.

"Hey Beca, I still have the jacket you loaned me and I would have waited to call you tomorrow but it had your IPod in the pocket and I was afraid you would be looking for it. So, just give me a call tomorrow and I can drop it by. Have a good night."

A dizzy satisfied pleasure infused her consciousness throughout the message. She remembered offering Chloe her jacket when they stopped for a break during the drive. It had made her feel a little chivalrous and she liked the idea of Chloe wearing her jacket. It looked better on her anyway. Of course, she had been scoffed at when she had suggested that. It was that simultaneous confidence in her body and humble nature that endeared Chloe to those who saw it.

She wasn't going to analyze any of this. It was three in the morning and she was liable to have any number of ill wrought emotions swirling within her. Lady crushes and boy problems could wait and in spite of her predicament she smiled. She would definitely see Chloe tomorrow and that, she decided, would help her sort out what was going on with her schizo emotional state, but something niggled at the edge of her consciousness.

Would she normally be this excited about seeing a friend? Chloe was different though, they had a different kind of connection to any she had experienced before. She had never had a close girl friend so maybe it was just a matter of gender difference. At the moment she was happy to build a wall to keep out the obvious conclusions.

She reached back for her headphones and pulled them onto her ears with every intention of retreating into her refuge. She turned her media player on and curled into a ball. Music would make her forget, at least until sleep overtook her and the confusing dreams involving one redhead took center stage. Maybe she shouldn't have put Titanium on repeat after all.


	2. Chapter 2

Chloe hung up the phone and sat back in her desk chair. She was still wearing Beca's jacket after all these hours. When she had shivered and mentioned that she had left her own in the bag that was stowed with the larger luggage Beca had immediately offered hers. It was a quick trip into the gas station so Fat Amy and Stacie could use the bathroom and everyone else could stretch their legs. The eager look on Beca's face had made her smile and gesture made her feel special but it was also a little bittersweet.

Seeing Beca with Jesse hurt her more than she was prepared for. It wasn't as if she had really put herself out there as an option at least not in her mind. However, it seemed to be obvious to everyone but Beca that she was head over heels. Aubry had been on her about it from the beginning. She even suggested that Chloe seduce Beca so that she could be a "good influence" on her. Chloe had translated that to; maybe you can make her fall in line. That was the only reason Aubry didn't gag every time she swooned over the memory of Beca's rap during the riff off yet again.

Her arm brushed the small bulge in the pocket where the iPod lay. She reached in and took it out. It wouldn't hurt anything to just see what music was on it. It might be crossing a line to some but Chloe wasn't really that great with boundaries where Beca was concerned anyway. She powered up the device, put in the ear buds, and scrolled through the playlists. A lot of it was mashups that Beca had created and a few original instrumental tracks. Then she hit a list titled "LadyJams" Now, her curiosity was really piqued. She held her breath as she took in the track list.

"Iris" - GoGo Dolls

"Creep" - Radiohead

"Closer" - Tegan and Sara

"Try" - Pink

"Wonderwall" - Oasis

"Feel So Close" - Calvin Harris

"Paper Thin" - Data Romance

"Titanium" - David Guetta fet. Sia

She didn't want to assume that this could have something to do with her but the appearance of "Titanium" was suspicious at best. Her brain kicked in and reminded her to exhale. She shook her head to help clear her thoughts. It had all started at the activities fair.

At the time her only worries were finding the right girls to repopulate the ranks of the Bellas, meeting the deadline for her senior project, and trying to get Aubrey to chilax a little. The girl was a major drama queen when it came to acapella. After Fat Amy had simultaneously impressed and weirded them out she had seen Beca checking out the booths. It was intrigue at first sight. She was pretty but she carried it in a way that told you that she wasn't aware or concerned about it. Her style was a little edgy or what Aubrey liked to call "alternative", but there was something else. A mote of brightness that sparkled at half light. She felt drawn to her instantly and some unknown instinct told her that this girl could shake things up in her world.

Then her mind fast forwarded to that infamous night. It was well known that Chloe wasn't shy so it hadn't really occurred to her that she probably shouldn't intrude on someone while they were taking a shower. Admittedly, she had been flirting with Beca in part and testing the waters but she had definitely felt a vibe between them, especially while they sang together. It wasn't a common situation, even for her, and that only heightened her attraction to Beca.

She pulled the the earbuds out of her ears and placed the iPod back in the jacket pocket. With a sigh she stood and stripped the jacket off, folding it neatly. Before she placed it on her chair she pressed the fabric to her nose and breathed in Beca's scent. It was a subtle combination of androgynous botanical and sweet lavender. She sighed, she had it so bad. It was sad really, she had never felt this pathetically smitten, no man or woman had ever gotten Chloe Beale this pitch whipped. The problem was she was pretty sure that Beca didn't even know and now she probably never would.

Chloe reluctantly let the jacket fall to the chair. Suspicious playlist or not Beca was with Jesse now and she would never interfere. She had missed her shot and all she could do now was concede defeat even if was just to herself. Sleeping it off the stress seemed like the best option. She would have to face Beca tomorrow when she returned the jacket and then they would be fine. she could never imagine losing Beca as a friend, even if in her heart she wanted so much more.

After she was ready for bed she slipped under the covers and suddenly her private room seemed very lonely. Up until this year she had roomed with Aubrey but they had each wanted their own space. Aubrey to relinquish the lack of control that a roommate, however close they were, caused; Chloe because she was tired of living under the dictatorship of her best friend and also because she felt it was rude to bring dates back for sleepovers if she had a roommate.

Aubrey actually gave good advice when she put her prejudices and personal vendettas aside. That was something she could use at the moment. How did you get over unrequited feelings. It wasn't an area she had any experience in. She had been pretty lucky apart from her first crush on a female. It wasn't really plausible to try to seduce your fifth grade teacher though, so she didn't really count that one. She would have to consult Aubrey tomorrow after the jacket exchange. No doubt she would want to hold a post championship meeting with the full Bellas within the week.

****There was no was getting any sleep at this rate so she reached for the only thing that relaxed her when she was trying to drift off, music. It was funny that she had found that playlist on Beca's iPod because she had one of her own. She set it on repeat and closed her eyes to the sounds of Ingrid Michaelson's "Locked Up".


	3. Chapter 3

_There were bright lights all around her. Smoke floating around the room made it hard to see but she was obviously in some kind of club. Neon strobe lights blinked in her eyes, making it harder to concentrate so she put her hand up to shield them. It smelled sweet, like perfume and it was the perfect temperature. Her eyes finally adjusted to the lighting and she could see the silhouette of someone standing across the small room. She could tell by the shapely body that it was a girl, and her form was familiar. The outline of wavy hair moved a little as the figure looked from side to side as if searching. Beca tried to take a step toward her but she was held in place by an outside force. She reached down and pulled her foot free of the floor. It made a popping sound as if being released from sludge or mud._

_When she looked back up the figure was farther away. Panic welled in her chest and she lunged forward afraid she reach her in time. Then the room went completely dark and she felt a hand on her shoulder. It was large and warm, a man's hand. She tried to shake it free but the fingers only dug into her skin through the fabric of her shirt. Then a light appeared below him and she saw the face. It was her face, not Jesse's as she had expected. The hand turned into her own and she desperately searched for the girl from across the room but she had disappeared._

'Buzz, buzz' It was her phone vibrating on the desk that woke her. She blinked, adjusting to the brightness of the room and grabbed the phone. She had set an alarm for noon, which was definitely not late enough.

"Ugh," she grunted to the empty room. Her roommate had only been around sporadically and even when she was there she muttered nasty things under her breath about "the white girl" and her weird friends. Just to tick her off she usually made sure that either Jesse or Chloe were over. She refused to lose the roommate war that they seemed to be waging. Having someone there also made it a little easier to deal with the awkward.

She stumbled down to the bathroom and washed up. Many times when she came down here she found herself humming Titanium. It hadn't been funny or cute at the time but now she was happy to say that she saw the shower invasion as just another one of those quirky things that Chloe did without thinking. She had a new appreciation for that day since it was the reason she had auditioned for the Bellas She shivered as she remembered their voices blending together. It had been almost impossible to forget that she was in a shower naked with a girl she hardly knew but those eyes, the connection... impossible to deny.

She considered the difference in how she related to Chloe and how she related to Jesse, using initiation night as a perfect example. Jesse hadn't excited any particular feelings other than amusement at his drunken shenanigans and mild curiosity but when Chloe had once again invaded her space she couldn't help but relax and casually flirt back after the momentary shock wore off. She was pretty sure Chloe had almost kissed her, or maybe it was Beca that had wanted to kiss Chloe. Whatever, what was important thing was that she had thought about it. She could still feel the soft red hair brush her face as she teetered into the inch of space that separated them.

She shook herself free of her vivid memory and returned to her room. Delaying the inevitable was silly so she picked up her phone and summoned some courage and texted Chloe to come over whenever she wanted. Her butt had barely touched the seat of her chair when she got a text back saying that Chloe would be by in fifteen.

"That was fast," she muttered. She felt her pulse quicken a little Chloe would be here soon. She wondered why this seemed so significant to her. It wasn't as if seeing one of her best and only friends on campus should be a big deal.


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks for reading guys! I hope you are all enjoying reading this as much as I do writing it. It seems to be coming to you in drips and drabs but I promise I have more written, I just am having trouble finding time to edit it with my schedule. Thanks for the reviews so far and keep them coming. I can't get better at writing without know what you guys think. Thanks!**

Chloe pushed back from her desk and turned to face the room. After taking a moment to gather herself, she left her paper half written and resigned herself to getting ready. She could just go up as she was but she felt icky just wearing her lounging clothes. She looked down and took in the worn yoga pants and t-shirt from a high school choir event. No, this would not do. She chided herself for making extra effort just because she cared about looking good for Beca.

It wasn't as if Beca was the only one who wasn't used to having deep feelings for someone. Chloe had been in exactly one serious relationship and that had ended in heartbreak so this was new territory for her as well in a way. "Screw it," she muttered and put on the first clothes that she came across in her closet.

Ten minutes and three flights of stairs later there she was, staring at Beca's door, clad in a purple flannel shirt, jeans, and boots. The jacket rested in the crook of her arm. She ran a hand through her hair one more time before Beca answered the door and then reminded herself that it was a useless gesture. Her friend didn't care what her hair looked like, at least not the way Chloe wanted her to care.

"Hey, Beca," Chloe smiled

Beca waved her in and sat back down at the desk, leaving the bed open for Chloe. "Hey," she replied, "Sorry I didn't get your call. My phone was on silent." With one look she was able to tell that Chloe was not exactly her usual chipper self.. She was still standing, which was odd. She and Jesse both tended to make themselves at home in her room and this felt more formal and loaded with something inexplicable.

"Here," Chloe said as she stepped forward and offered Beca the jacket. "Thanks again for letting me borrow it and sorry I didn't remember to give it back last night."

"No, problem," Beca said. Her brow wrinkled. "Are you gonna sit down?"

"Oh, yeah, sure." Chloe sat down on the edge of the bed.. She tried to relax a little, not wanting Beca to get the wrong idea. This was step one in getting used to the way things were. They had to rewind a little bit to go forward again. She had to start thinking of Beca as just a friend. If she could get past the feelings that burdened her, maybe it would be okay and they could be like before.

"So," Beca started. She wasn't used to having to carry the conversation. "Do you want to do something? I don't know maybe get lunch?" She was choosing to ignore the obvious stiffness between them and racked her mind for ways to cheer Chloe up. Even though she had been nervous about seeing her, she could never say no to spending time with Chloe..

"You know, I was working on a paper and I really should get back to it," Chloe said. There was a little hesitation in her voice but she really needed more time to process the situation. She stood and made her way to the door, turning back after she placed a hand on the knob. "I'll see you at the Bellas meeting. Aubrey wants to get together tomorrow," she opened the door, "you should get a text from her about it later."

Beca stood up and walked after her, reaching the door as Chloe let go of it. She rested against the door frame. "Is everything okay?" Of everyone she had met this year Chloe had been the one to find her way the farthest into Beca's heart and her concern was genuine. If she could help she would and even if she couldn't she at least wanted to know what was going on.

Chloe tried to smile. "Of course, everything's fine," she reached out and squeezed Beca's arm and then let her hand fall when she felt the unmistakable connection through their skin, "I'm just a little stressed." She looked down. "Okay, I'll see you later."

"Good luck with the paper," Beca called as she watched Chloe towards the stairs. Chloe waved in reply and disappeared into the stairwell. She closed the door and leaned against it. She tried to trace back to when Chloe's behavior had altered.

The last few days were still a bit of a blur. After the ICCA performance she had rushed into the crowd to find Jesse and then later they had all gathered backstage after the awards were handed out. Jesse had suggested that they all go out to dinner.

_She remembered sitting between Chloe and Jesse in the restaurant. They were all jazzed about the win that she hadn't really paid attention to much else. There had been much rehashing of the performances and a lot of friendly contention about who deserved to win. Jesse had commanded much of her attention so aside from banter shared by the whole group she hadn't really spoken to Chloe until they were back at the hotel._

_It was four girls per room and that meant sharing a double bed with someone. She had snagged Chloe as a bedmate, leaving Aubrey to bunk with Fat Amy. She wasn't sure Aubrey would ever forgive her for that since Amy had clipped her toenails in bed. Chloe had seemed a little subdued considering their victory but she hadn't given much thought to it at the time._

Her stomach growled startling her out of her thoughts. It was definitely time to get some food, maybe Jesse wanted to get lunch.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Thanks for the feedback guys! It helps me keep going. BG-13 you might like this chapter. ;-)**

Weeks later everything was exponentially worse. Jesse was being too clingy, Aubrey was pestering her about the minutiae of taking over the Bellas, and Chloe was nowhere to be found. She had used upcoming finals as her excuse and under different circumstances Beca would have let it go but she missed their late night chats and seamless interactions more than she should.

They would sit in Beca's room and talk about everything and nothing until the sky lightened. It was a little ritual of their's over the weeks leading up to the final competition. Sometimes Chloe would bring her books and she would study while Beca mixed, each girl content to simply be in each other's presence. Come to find out it was something Beca needed in her life, someone to simply exist with her in a harmony that they made unintentionally. She knew she could be thorny at times but it never seemed to phase Chloe. Maybe it was because she could see past the frontal assault of snark to the fearful, dark place that it came from.

Everyone else wanted something from her that she wouldn't or couldn't give. Chloe never pressured her to give anything that she wasn't willing to let go of, which was a lot. It was this patience that made Beca believe that of out of all of her friends Chloe actually cared about who she was not just what she presented to the world.

She was trying her best to be patient with Jesse but every day it seemed like there was something new that made her want to admit defeat. He was all over her in more than one way. He was emotionally and physically sloppy, covering her in his affection and kisses that still failed to spark more than a passing interest in her.

She constantly reminded herself that he was a great guy, which he was, but there were only so many pep talks she could give herself before it went way past ridiculous. She was seriously beginning to think about ending it but it was harder than it might seem. This had been her way to turn over a new leaf. She was trying to be more emotionally available but she was pretty sure that it was going all wrong. She had chosen the wrong person to invest in and fixing that without breaking their friendship was going to be the hard part. She didn't want to hurt Jesse and unfortunately it was a little more complicated now.

Her dad had asked about Jesse off and on after they had met while bailing Beca out of jail and during one of those interactions she was forced to admit to him that they were dating so tonight they were both going over to have dinner at his house. She would have turned it down flat if Jesse hadn't overheard the phone call and swiped the phone from her so he could accept for both of them, which was just an example of little things he did that ticked her off. After they had hung up he had looked as excited as a puppy being adopted from the pound so she had felt guilty enough to keep the date.

Thirty minutes into dinner Beca had determined that she was in hell. Jesse and her father were getting on too well as food and conversation were passed around the table. It seemed Jesse and her Dad had a lot in common, which was completely alarming. The moment that they bonded over a love of cheesy Kung Fu movies she knew it was over for her. They even got Shelia involved in the fun, leaving Beca to curse the day that she was born, though seeing her father trying to imitate Bruce Lee was pretty hilarious she admitted grudgingly.

The upside was that she didn't have to contribute much to the conversation. That left her mind free to wander and after failing to think of a way to escape through the window without anyone noticing, her thoughts went straight to Chloe.

She was tired of wondering what was going on with her. In the past she wouldn't have pushed it, taking the silence at face value but she felt herself compelled to do something. It was probably a result of the huge volume of Chloe related thoughts she had experienced over the weeks. Her logic was that if she could just solve the mystery the barrage of thoughts would stop. She could stop cursing herself for missing the safety of having Chloe around. As soon as she got home she decided to call her, or text. Yes, a text was less intrusive. She prayed that Chloe would answer.

They made it all the way through dinner without further incident, apart from her Dad remarking on her silence and lack of involvement. Beca even managed to be civil to her step-mom and thanked her for having them over. Jesse's goodbyes were much more verbose and she began to despair once again that they would never get out of there..

Finally, they said their final parting words, her dad patting her on the back and saying, "I like this one." She tried to smile but it came out more as a grimace, which refused to leave her face because Jesse chatted at her all the way back to her dorm.

She managed to give him one and two word answers and nodded along to everything that didn't require her to speak but she was pretty sure he had caught on to her lack of attention span. She felt bad for practically ignoring him and unfortunately it had come kind of commonplace for her. It wasn't intentional but it was definitely not fair to him. He deserved a girl who was as smitten with him as he was with her.

They had just reached the entrance to the dorm when Beca saw someone familiar walking off in the direction of the library. Without any warning she was gone, leaving Jesse in mid-sentence. Chloe was about two hundred yards away and walking at a good clip so by the time Beca caught up she was winded. "Chloe," she yelled, "wait up!"

As soon as Chloe heard her name she stopped cold and turned around, her hair swinging with the motion. Beca stopped in front of her, panting. There was a reason she hated running and it was this part. She was sure she looked like a giant dork as she bent over and tried to catch her breath."Hey, where have you been?" Before she answered Chloe glanced back to where Jesse was walking to catch up and then back at Beca who was still panting but standing upright.

"Just studying," she shifted from one foot to another, "This capstone project is kicking my ass."

Beca turned as Jesse approached, wishing she could have just a few more moments alone with Chloe. He stopped beside her and bumped her shoulder with his. "I didn't know you could run that fast, Flo-Jo," he joked. She didn't respond to him but instead focused in on Chloe again.

There was this moment of silent communication that passed between them. It was like they were both reading the same undercurrent and translated the energy as words passing between them. She felt the disquiet and sadness coming off of the redhead like a cascade. She wore it on her face and in her movements. The tension stretched between them opening up a new mental dialogue. Chloe's hands clutched the strap of her messenger bag and her eyes narrowed, as if it would help her take everything in.

"Hey, Chloe," Jesse said, breaking the silence. He looked between them like he was watching a tennis match. "How's it going?" He took in the potency of the moment, sensing that he was now extraneous.

Chloe broke her gaze with Beca and acknowledged him. "Hey, Jesse. It's going... just trying to get past finals." She glanced back at Beca who was staring straight back at her. The intensity of the gaze gave her pause. She wondered if Beca realized that Jesse was still there.

"Oh yeah," Jesse continued, "What are you planning after graduation?" He was using the moment to process and test out a theory.

"Um, well, I got accepted to grad school here so just enjoying the summer until fall comes around again," she finished.

"Nice," Jesse replied, "So, we will still get to see you around."

"Yeah, definitely," Chloe said and looked back at Beca, "Well, I better get to the library." The whole exchange was awkward and she wanted to get out of there in case she gave anything away. Jesse seemed like a pretty perceptive guy and she found Beca's behavior out of the ordinary. Her heart ticked faster and something itched at her mind. She pushed it away and focused on detaching herself from aura of confusing emotion emanating from Beca.

"Okay, see ya later," Jesse said.

"Text me... whenever," Beca said before Chloe gave them a parting wave and started walking again. Beca's body moved involuntarily so that she could watch the redhead as she strode into the night..

"You ready to go up," Jesse asked, breaking her reverie.

"Yeah." She glared at the back of his head as he started off towards the door.

They walked to her room in silence. Beca was on a precipice of self discovery that was somewhat akin to falling off a cliff. This had snuck up on her and that fact coupled with her inability to fight this ardor, even as it set off warning bells, was irritating. She had no idea what the thing crawling around in her stomach was, but it was one of those terrible all encompassing feelings that she usually avoided. Other people might call it longing.

It was apparent to her that she needed to sort this out, maybe for once in her life face something head on. Her heart was so off balance with everything happening at once and the only person she wanted to talk to about it was avoiding her.

It didn't occur to her that she had mentally checked out until Jesse took her arm and sat her down on the bed. She had no memory of entering the room. She felt like she was back in that dream and she couldn't focus on what was tangible. He went back to close the door and lock it in case Kimmy Jin decided to wander in.

He sat down beside her. "What's wrong, Becs?"

"Nothing," she replied, brushing his words aside. Avoidance and ambiguity were her first defenses.

"Come on," he said, "you've been off and on ever since we got back from New York and I've been doing my best to give you some space and let you figure it out but now I'm starting to wonder." He bent down, trying to force her to look at him.

Her head snapped up, giving him her full attention. "Wonder what?" Her mind was spinning and dread beat like a drum in her head.

"Do you really want to be with me," he asked. She was silent, her mouth opening and closing. "Because if you don't, I really need to know now." His face was blank as if his expression depended directly on her reaction.

"Jesse, I.." She gathered all the pieces of her consciousness and gave a second of hard thought to what she was about to say. "I don't know." She winced, this was the hard part. This moment was where she could no longer dodge the truth. "It's totally not you. I just don't know what I want right now." She tried to say it as gently as possible.

"Does it have anything to do with Chloe," he ventured.

"What?!" The question sent her stomach curling into a heated ball. "No, I... what do you mean?"

"Beca, come on, look at what just happened, how you guys act around each other." He took her hand, and waited until she looked up at him again. Dismay colored her features. She had been completely blindsided by his line of inquiry. "It's not just tonight. I've noticed it all along," he said.

"I remember initiation night, I saw you guys talking and it looked like something more was going on but I just shrugged it off," he paused when she stood and walked across the room, "Maybe I didn't want it to be true so I just figured that was just how you guys are with each other but the way you talk about her, and your face when your phone goes off and you realize that it's not her."

Beca sighed and turned towards him again. "What are you saying," she gestured, "That I'm in love with Chloe?" The words came unbidden from somewhere deep inside her.

"I don't know," he replied, "but you definitely like her more than you should if she is just a friend to you."

"Say, you're right," she ground out, "What difference does it make? She doesn't feel the same way." Beca's stubborn nature was making her fight him, even if she realized now that he might be right. It might explain Chloe's behavior of late but hope was something that Beca stuffed down to avoid the cold hurt of disappointment.

"Are you kidding me," he snapped back, "Her face, Beca... all I had to do was look at her face back there." He pointed out the window. "I even saw it when you let her borrow your jacket on the bus the other night. You flirt... both of you"

"I haven't seen her in weeks," now the words flew from her mouth with venom, "How can I flirt with someone who isn't there?"

"Beca, listen to what you just said, it's like you're more mad at her for not being around than you are at me for talking about breaking up." He sighed and let his head drop into his hands.

"Whatever," she said, throwing up her hands. Adrenaline kept her from focusing her thoughts on anything more substantial that what was occurring from one second to the next.

"It's true," his words were muffled as they tricked from between his hands, "It really is true," He looked up, "It's over, isn't it." Any hope he had of being wrong fled when he saw her eyes.

"Jesse," she said his name in a softer tone, tears had sprung to her eyes. He pushed himself up and went to her. She let him envelop her into his arms. He quickly placed a kiss on her the side of her head and released her leaving her arms to hang loosely at her sides in his absence.

"Just don't make her wait too long," he whispered. With that he was leaving, evoking the memories of seclusion she had long since buried.


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: JustLikeBrookeDavis - Beca is a little stubborn, poor dear, BG-13 - You might have more than Jesse to thank by the end of this fic, Thanks to all of you who have commented and continue to read!**

"Chloe," Aubrey snapped impatiently, "Hello!"

"Oh," Chloe closed her eyes and shook her head slightly, "I'm sorry Aubrey, I just can't seem to concentrate lately."

Aubrey circled around Chloe's dorm room and placed herself directly in her friend's sight line. They were nearly nose to nose. "Have you heard anything I've said?"

Chloe shrugged and shook her head apologetically. "Uh huh," Aubrey said, narrowing her eyes, "Well, now that I have your attention I can inform you of the fact that my senior project is a complete disaster. The three main actors have quit, and I need your help." Her entire demeanor, from the hand on her hips to her stern expression, said that she would entertain no refusal.

Chloe was trying to focus on what Aubrey was saying, she really was, but her mind had been a bit of a mess for almost a month. Between dealing with romantic disappointment and trying to get ready to defend her thesis she was feeling completely stressed and dejected. Even her seeming super power for putting on a happy face and rolling with the punches was failing her right now. So, she sat before Aubrey a shell of her formerly incessantly chipper self.

It was one thing to miss Beca from afar but it was quite another to see her with Jesse like she had last night. Sure, it had seemed like there was some tension going on between them but this weird triangle thing that seemed to have developed made it even more confusing. She wasn't sure which feelings to trust anymore, not that she could tell them apart at this point. She felt like Hurricane Feels had made landfall in her heart.

"Okay, what do you need me to do," she asked warily. She had no idea how she could help since Aubrey was a theatre major with her specific focus being directing, which meant her project was to write and direct a one act play.

"I need you to act," Aubrey said dramatically.

"Um, no," Chloe said, her head shaking from side to side vehemently, "I hate acting and I suck at it."

"No, you don't." Aubrey gestured towards her. "Sophomore year you did A Midsummer NIght's Dream for theatre workshop and you were great."

Chloe's eyes went wide. "Seriously? Do you not remember the part where I fell off the stage when I was trying to hit my mark? And as I recall, I only did that because you pestered me until I agreed." Aubrey's talent for selective memory was especially helpful when she was convincing someone to do something they weren't formerly disposed to do.

"Well, let's revisit that," Aubrey grinned, "How much pestering did I actually have to do to get you to agree?"

Chloe got up and moved away from her best friend. She found it hard to turn anyone down when they were in need but especially those she cared about. They had been friends since Freshman year but she was just so damn tired from all the insanity in her life and from what she remembered when Aubrey was telling her about it months ago this play was going to take a lot of work. It was a one act musical, lasting about forty minutes and centered around three main characters.

"I have my own project to do," Chloe ventured. She crossed her arms and tried to stay firm.

"I know Chlo, but I don't really have any other options. It won't take you long to learn the lines and choreography. Really, it will be just like learning a Bellas routine. That's why you're perfect for it."

She turned to look at Aubrey. Her best friend's pleading look wore on Chloe's conscience. If their positions were reversed Aubrey would do it for her. She sighed, "Fine," she relented.

"Yes!" Aubrey shoved a copy of the play at her and rushed for the door. "Start reading it and I'll text you later. I have to round up a few more people. We will meet for a rehearsal tomorrow in Kimbel Hall."

"So, how long do we have to put this together," Chloe asked tentatively.

"Two weeks," Aubrey replied, grinning.

"What?!" Chloe was shocked. "That's impossible," she said. There was no way she could learn lines, songs, and choreography in that amount of time.

"We can do it. I've got most of the props and the set done so we can focus on the routines and songs," Aubrey's face broke and Chloe could see the stress she was under. "Please, Chloe."

"Okay, okay, we will give it a shot," Chloe relented.

"Great," Aubrey nearly squeaked, "I'll call you later with details." She was nearly out the door when she stopped and turned back around. "And then we can also talk about why you've been so freaking depressed over Beca." Without waiting for Chloe to answer she left.

Well, at least she would be distracted from the train wreck that had become her life. She had to present her own project in two days so it wouldn't overlap with Aubrey's play too much. She curled up on her bed and looked at the script, Divisi : A Musical In One Act. She opened it and started reading.

By the time she had gotten to the fourth page all she could do was sigh and squeeze her eyes shut. It centered around an a capella group getting ready for a big performance. To make it even more perfect the central plot was a love triangle between the main character and two guys.

"Great," she muttered to the empty room. She had the distinct feeling that someone up there was toying with her.

Aubrey had tried everyone she could think of and no one seemed to be willing to learn pages worth of lines and three songs in the short amount of time they had before premiere night. She had even asked a few of the Trebles, who had all laughed in her face (at least they did it on key), except Uni who had promised to be there for background vocals and props.

Everyone else was falling back on the old standby of studying for finals but Aubrey suspected that some of them just didn't want to work with her. That was why her original actors had quit anyway. She supposed she might have been a tiny bit hard on them, but they really weren't committed enough. Good riddance, she thought to herself.

She still needed two more people for the male leads. So, she was on her way to ambush Jesse after his afternoon music appreciation class. Back when she was the diva in charge she had memorized all of the Bella's class schedules in case she ever needed to track them down and she just so happened to have noticed that Jesse was in Beca's Monday afternoon music appreciation class.

She had just hit the first set of stairs on the second floor when she heard Jesse and Beca's voices echoing further up in the stairwell. Instinct took over and she stopped where she was and listened in.

"Did you tell her yet?"

"So, that was awesome that we got out early," Beca said, ignoring his question, "I think the final is going to be easy."

"Answer me, Becs... did you tell Chloe that you had a big ol' sapphic toner for her?"

Beca scoffed, "Eww gross, why did you have to put it like that... and no, absolutely not." She shook her head.

.

"You're going to have to do it sooner or later or you'll never forgive yourself," he warned.

"No, you of all people know that it takes me awhile to process and I can think of five million good reasons not to say anything," she replied added her patented eyebrow raise for good measure.

"Like?"

Aubrey could hear them descending the stairs now and got ready to leave before they caught her eavesdropping. She stood next to the second floor landing door and kept listening.

"Like we're both extremely busy right now, you heard what she said the other night..."

"Bullshit," he cut her off, "You're just scared."

"Shove it, Swanson. Anyway, how are you dealing with our tragic break up?"

Her tone was light but concerned, the only way Beca knew how to approach a sensitive subject like this. She was willing to go there just to distract him from his line of questioning.

"I'm good, just glad to know that it really wasn't me, just your lesbian tendencies," he joked.

"Jesse," Beca said in a warning tone.

"Seriously, I'm fine. I'm still bummed but all I want is for you to be happy. It's not like we were engaged or something. We only dated for what... a month."

"Yeah, but I still feel bad, kind of like I led you on for awhile" she said sympathetically.

"No need to feel bad. I understand where you were coming from, but you know changing the subject doesn't mean you're off the hook," he assured her.

They were now on the landing directly above Aubrey so she slipped through the door and into the hallway. She had been shocked at first but really it made a lot of sense. An idiot could see that there had been some kind of chemistry between Beca and Chloe from the beginning but for Beca to feel strongly enough about her after all these months to break up with Jesse, that changed things in Aubrey's book. As much as she hated to admit it, they might actually be good for each other and maybe then Chloe would stop moping around, which would make bestfriend duty that much easier.

It sounded like Beca wasn't going to do anything about it and she knew that she would never convince Chloe to be proactive in this kind of situation either. The girl was all about getting in your physical space but emotionally she was a little shy. So, in her devious little mind a plan started to take shape. She grinned to herself feeling quite clever. If neither girl would get over themselves long enough to confess their undying love then she would just have to give them a little push. She knew just the man to help her.


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N: BG-13 - Aubrey's plans never fail. *shakes head vehemently*, JustLikeBrookDavis - Yeah, that was kind of a give away, wasn't it. Oh well, enjoy, NZfulla - That's so sweet. I am glad you are enjoying it and I hope that you continue to do so. It's about to get interesting. **

* * *

Beca was enjoying a quiet afternoon of avoiding studying for her finite final when her phone went off. She read the caller ID, Aubrey Posen. She was so not in the mood to talk to her so she hit ignore, which was a mistake because ten minutes later there was a pounding at the door.

She looked up in confusion, her headphones slipping off her head in the process. She wasn't expecting anyone and Jesse, the only person who stopped by uninvited now, was in class. Then a thought occurred to her. Dare she hope that it was Chloe?

She opened the door, her heart beating a little quicker than before. When she saw Aubrey on the other side she knew that she should have anticipated this. She wasn't an easy person to ignore. "Hey," she greeted the blonde.

Aubrey nodded and brushed past Beca into the room. She was wearing a sweet smile, too sweet, which was never good. She had a bad feeling about this. "Beca, I'll get right to the point. You know I'm not one to ask favors."

Beca snorted, "No, you usually just tell people what to do."

Aubrey almost gave a snarky reply before she thought better of it, reminding herself that she was here to convince Beca to do something she really wasn't going to want to do. She schooled her face into a pleasant mask of innocence.

"Well, now I'm here to ask," Aubrey said pointedly.

Beca saw the change in expression and was even more wary now. Nothing about this situation was going to be good. She could feel it in her bones but nagging curiosity demanded that she hear what Aubrey had to say.

"To make a long story short a few actors dropped out of the play I am directing for my senior project and I can't find any replacements so I was wondering if there was any way I could persuade you to help me out?" Aubrey put on her best begging face and crossed her fingers. She didn't want to have to pull out the big guns.

"What?" This was not what Beca had expected. She hadn't even known that Aubrey was a theatre major. Her skeptical expression prompted more persuasion.

"If I don't find people to fill these roles I will not be able to put on the play and then I'll fail and then I won't graduate and then my father will come back from Afghanistan and kill me and.."

"Woah, woah," Beca interrupted her, "That's a lot of information to process there." She considered for a few moments, enjoying watching her (sort of) friend squirm. She considered drawing it out even longer but she'd rather not entertain Aubrey for any longer than necessary. " I'm not saying yes but what would I have to do?"

"Ah ha!" Aubrey clapped her hands together and sat down on Beca's bed. "It's a one act musical so all you have to do is learn a few lines, three songs, and a little choreography before senior gala week. You'd kind of be saving my ass... again." She added that last part even if it was only partially true. In the end it was Aubrey that was going to be doing Beca the favor.

Beca's head tilted slightly as she thought over the proposition. "That sounds like a lot of work, how fast do I have to learn it."

She was only considering this because she felt a weird sense of camaraderie with her former nemesis now that they had put their differences aside to share the pitch pipe, and because she really did believe that Aubrey's dad would do something crazy if she didn't graduate. They had actually kind of bonded over their father issues in the weeks before the ICCAs. Also, it never hurt to have someone like Aubrey owe you a favor.

"Two weeks," Aubrey said.

"Uh...?!" Beca's eyes widened. She wasn't really that familiar with theater but it sounded like a really short amount of time to learn everything that Aubrey had mentioned. She remembered what a pain it had been to learn the Bella's routines and how stressful it had been to re-learn everything for their new and improved finals routine, and they had longer than two weeks to do that.

"Chloe's going to be one of the other leads," Aubrey said.

"I'll do it," Beca said without thinking.

Aubrey's face widened in a knowing smile. She had been waiting for just the right time to fire her kill shot. Yes, her plan was definitely coming together. Now, if she could just get her cohort on board.

* * *

_One hour later..._

_770-896-1343: Jesse, it's Aubrey. We need to talk._

_Jesse Trebble:_ Aub_rey?! Where did you get my number? What's going on?_

_770-896-1343: I have my ways. Listen, I know you and Beca broke up and that she's head over heels for Chloe. I have a plan. Are you going to help me or not?_

_Jesse Trebble: How did you find all this out?_

_770-896-1343: Never mind that. Are you in?_

_Jesse Trebble: Depends. What do you have in mind._

_770-896-1343: You, Beca, and Chloe in my senior project (one act musical) You and Beca playing characters vying for Chloe's character's heart._

_Jesse Trebble: What?! This is pretty crazy... I don't know._

_770-896-1343: Just say yes. It's going to work. My plans never fail._

_Jesse Trebble: Then yes, what do I have to do?_

_770-896-1343: Good! Meet me tomorrow night at 7 for the first rehearsal. Chloe doesn't know Beca's going to be involved._

_Jesse Trebble: Umm, okay? Are you sure about this?_

_770-896-1343: Just be there. I'll fill you in oh phase two after rehearsal._

* * *

The theatre was dark when she walked in but Beca knew that Aubrey had to be close on her heels. If she was late it would the first time that it had happened since they'd been introduced. It was one minute to seven and she was starting to think that she was in the wrong place when the lights kicked on. She spun around, expecting to see Aubrey but it was Jesse instead.

"Hey, what are you doing here," she asked, confusion coloring her features.

He smiled as he casually strode towards her. "I got roped into doing this too." With that he tossed a copy of the play onto the table at the side of the stage.

"Oh," she replied still surprised, "I didn't know you and Aubrey even talked."

"Well, she was pretty desperate for a male lead and I can't resist a lady in need so here I am." He spread his arms wide as if presenting himself to the non-existent audience.

"And he's humble too," she said with extra sarcasm.

"Yes, well, I am all things virtuous and charming," he replied. He slid onto the table, picking up the script in the process and settled there, looking quite comfortable. Just when she thought her eye roll was going to go on forever they heard a door close at the top of the elevated seating area. Aubrey strode towards them, a confident smirk playing on her lips.

"There are my little actors," she said loudly so that it demonstrated the excellent acoustics of the room. She walked slowly down the steps, making as dramatic an entrance as possible.

Beca watched her descent, her eyes darting to and fro, searching. "Aren't we missing someone," Beca asked, worried that Aubrey had tricked her into doing this and that Chloe wasn't really coming.

"Nope," Aubrey said as she stood aside to show them that Chloe was trailing behind her. They reached the stage area and Beca zeroed in on the readhead. She checked her over visually and determined that she was still as gorgeous as ever. She wasn't sure what she had expected to feel when she saw her again but it was all still there the little flip of the stomach, the catching breath, and the sweaty palms. All sure signs that she was in so much trouble.

It was just, now that she was getting more comfortable with her feelings for Chloe, she was even more aware of all of her attractive qualities. Those tiny things about the redhead that made adrenaline race through her body and made her react like an lovesick idiot.

Both girls sat in the front row of seats while Beca leaned against the side of the table Jesse was sitting on. "I have one question," Beca said when she had determined that they were all comfortable.

"And what's that," Aubrey replied.

"Well, in the script you have one girl, Ella, and these two guys who are after her. So, what part am I playing?" Her eyes strayed to Chloe who was waiting intently for Aubrey to answer. Apparently, they were both wondering the same thing.

Aubrey couldn't suppress a sly grin. "I'm glad you asked," she looked from Beca to Chloe and back again, "I couldn't find another guy to fill the role so I decided to make Jack a girl but keep the same name. So, that's who you're playing and obviously Jesse's playing Henry. That leaves Ella for Chloe to play. Lesbians are very in this season," Aubrey said, quite pleased with herself.

"What?" Chloe's surprise was palatable. She hadn't signed up for playing out her real life love triangle on stage, though she should have guessed that Aubrey would pull something like this. Jesse didn't seemed as surprised as she and Beca did though which threw up a red flag but she didn't dwell on it too much, being more alarmed by the fact that her character kissed Beca's in one of the scenes she had read after Aubrey had given her the script.

Aubrey nodded solemnly and crossed her legs. "Yep, now if everyone wants to open your scripts we're going to do a quick read through so you can get acquainted with your parts."

Chloe rolled her eyes. Of course, Aubrey would just assume that she would be okay with this. Vowing to have a strongly worded conversation with her best friend later, she dutifully opened her script and tried to ignore the tumult of emotions welling up in her chest.

Except that was hard when she could feel Beca's gaze on her, the intimacy of it tugging at her until she looked up and met dark blue eyes. It was there buzzing beneath her skin the undeniable, unfaltering connection. They were both bound by its power. She crossed her legs and tried to ignore the need that had ignited inside her.


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N: Sorry this one took so long. Work has been hell and I've started a new little project. NZfulla- You're review was lovely. Thank you for the continued support. Daffusizers - Yeah, I can just hear Aubrey saying that as justification. It's a pretty good one. Big thanks to everyone who read and reviewed! You guys know how to keep me going. I hope you enjoy.**

It was day five of rehearsal and in three days hell week would begin. The last week before a show when every word, set, and direction was nailed down culminating in dress rehearsal and then their first performance. Everyone was starting to get their parts down and the students working tech were getting things in order for props, sets, and lighting.

Thankfully, Aubrey was far too organized to leave anything to chance so she had two whole binders of typed notes and diagrams in case anything should happen. Everyone in the theatre department called her Director Dictator, at least to her face. She had no idea what they called her behind her back. She reveled in it because to her it wasn't a negative reputation but a rallying point for her self confidence. She knew she was a control freak and she liked it that way. It eliminated the need to rely on others.

"No, no... NO!" Aubrey approached the stage and smacked her hand against the open script in her other hand."You're supposed to be in love with each other, so freakin' act like it." She walked up to them and placed a hand on both girl's back and pushed them towards each other until they were uncomfortably close. "Now, look into each other's eyes like you actually want to kiss."

Chloe shrugged off Aubrey's hand and looked up. Beca was staring right back at her, dark blue eyes containing something she hadn't seen there before. She blinked quickly, taken aback. Maybe she just saw something she wanted to. She set her shoulders and relaxed, keeping her gaze steady. They started to breathe in unison and and her pupils dilated because of their proximity. She reached her hands out and felt Beca's fingers meet hers as if they had communicated the need to touch without words.

It didn't occur to her that they hadn't actually moved for a full minute. Aubrey stepped back slowly, trying not to break the spell. Beca's fingers squeezed hers and she fell a little deeper into the power of the moment. It was like they were holding each other mentally, caressing the energy between them. The probing attraction found hold in each of their hearts and tugged them together like the air was being vacuumed out from between them.

They were no more than an inch apart now and the last distance would have closed if someone hadn't knocked over a coat rack that was being prepared as a prop. It landed with a bang and both girls jumped apart as if lightning had struck the ground at their feet. Beca rubbed her forehead and started at the ground. It was hard to imagine being that turned on from just looking into Chloe's eyes but it had happened. In her mind she had leaned forward and let their lips collapse together but the frustration of reality kept the truth of the feeling tantalizingly out of reach.

"What's wrong with you," Aubrey yelled. Beca started and looked up, realizing that she wasn't the one being yelled at. The poor soul that had knocked over the prop was backing away slowly, palms up as if it would defend her against the onslaught of an angry Aubrey. "Idiot Face! Get that off the ground and get back to work," Aubrey finished. Chloe turned to watch the poor girl do as she was told and run into the backstage area. "Don't be a bitch, Aubrey," Chloe said.

Aubrey returned to the front of the stage and shrugged. "What, they work better with a little fear instilled in them." Beca's eyes widened, grateful that she and Chloe weren't being treated like she had just witnessed "idiot face" being treated. She would be out of here faster than it took that coat rack to hit the ground. Aubrey sighed and looked at them both. "Okay, let's call it a night," she said. She looked up into towards the large control booth in the back. "Leigha, get those lights out! We're stopping!"

* * *

Hell week, every theater student's time of frenzy. Lighting cues, lines learned, final touches on costumes. It was hell for a reason. There was so much to accomplish to make the show go off without a hitch. If they succeeded in their job dress rehearsal would work out most of the kinks and opening night would flow seamlessly. That was rarely the case. This is why Aubrey was even more fanatical about every little detail now..

Thus Beca found herself running lines with Jesse in her dorm room late Tuesday night. "She doesn't love me, she loves you," he said. They were off script and thankfully there weren't really that many lines to read. "Then why won't she talk to me," she replied. It came out sounding lifeless. She was so exhausted. This had been way more work than she had bargained for but she was near Chloe... for hours every day. That was what counted.

"Beca, you sound terrible. You should go to bed." Jesse shot her a stern look.

"Gee, thanks," she replied, rubbing her eyes. She was about to fall asleep but she wanted to get this down perfectly. She wasn't nearly as crazy as Aubrey but she did have a bit of a perfectionist's take on anything involving music or performance.

"No, seriously," he lightly punched her arm, "I think we both need some sleep." He got up and stretched.

.

She sank back and watched him move around in an attempt to regain feeling in his legs. "I'm kind of worried," she said.

"About what?"

"The kiss at the end," she said it quickly. It had been preoccupying her ever since they had run the scene in rehearsal. "I don't know if I want our first kiss to be a stage kiss."

"Why don't you just tell Chloe how you feel and then you two can kiss for real before the show and live happily ever after and ride off into the sunset and on and on." He waved his hand in a circular motion. He was getting tired of her excuses for not breaking her silence. It was tired. They had the same conversation over and over at this point. He wasn't even sure if Aubrey's plan was going to work considering her attitude and inability to acknowledge that Chloe obviously had feelings for her as well. Beca seemed to find every opportunity to talk herself out of going for it.

"You know why," she said, annoyed.

"I know you're scared as fuck and you need to get over yourself." He hadn't meant it to sound so harsh but he was exhausted and a little angry at her for wasting this. If part of the reason they had broken up was her feelings for Chloe she could at least have the decency to follow through on it.

Beca scowled and lay back against the wall. She knew he was right but that fear that she was going to get hurt overwhelmed her every time she thought that she had gathered the required strength to just go talk to Chloe. They still had to perform in this play together and she didn't want to make it awkward for either of them if Chloe didn't feel the same way. They had to kiss, after all. She'd really feel like an ass if she quit for that reason so she kept quiet, torturing herself... and Jesse.

* * *

Friday morning dawned and Chloe awoke to overcast skies. She shut off her alarm and looked out the window. Drizzle dotted the glass and the clouds appeared to darken before her eyes, a bad omen. She threw back the covers and scooted to the edge of the bed. A shower, that would make her feel better, a long, hot shower. She was due at the theatre this afternoon, something she wasn't really looking forward to, especially knowing that they had dress rehearsal. This would be the moment that they actually had to follow through on the kiss.

She stripped down and donned her robe and then gathered her shower caddy containing everything she would need in the way of toiletries and draped a towel over her arm. She slipped her flip flops on as she left the room and wandered down the hallway in the direction of the stairs.

She reached the showers and chose an empty stall at the far end of the room and turned on the water. It's warmth started to fill the tiny space and she instantly felt a little more alive. There were only two things that could really wake her up in the morning and a shower was the less smutty of the two.

She was halfway through shampooing when she heard a voice. Her hands dropped to her sides and suds flowed down her body. Her heart beat painfully, and tears of frustration formed in her eyes. It was Beca's clear and bright voice that floated to her, steadily getting closer until it held steady no more than ten feet away.. She heard water turn on and then the interruption of the spray as Beca stepped into it.

This really was torture. It wasn't enough that she had to remember every contour of Beca's body from their earlier shower encounter; now she could imagine it even more vividly with her so near by. The only thing missing was Tom, thankfully. She rinsed her hair and hurried through the rest of her shower, listening as her body flushed with need. It was a familiar song, one she knew well. They had sang it together in practice one day when they were just fooling around and talking about their favorite music.

"Next thing we're touching,

you look at me,

it's like you hit me with lightning

Oh, everybody's starry eyed,

and everybody knows

Oh, everybody's starry eyed

and my body goes woah, oh oh"

Chloe could until only sit and listen until she got to the end of the song. Her back was against the shower wall and she was sliding down until she caught herself. She had to get out of here. It was like the universe was trying to stretch her until she broke, going mad.

She rushed into her robe and padded towards the exit. She had to pass Beca's shower on the way. She couldn't help but look over and see the silhouette of Beca's naked body as she washed herself clean. She was captured by the sight but soon enough Beca started the song over again and she snapped out of her reverie. "Oh god..." The words slipped from her mouth before she knew what was happening. She rushed out, walking as quickly as she could while avoiding slipping on the wet floor.

Beca's head shot from behind the shower curtain at the sound of Chloe's voice just in time to catch a view of her retreating form. "Chloe," she whispered. She wondered if she'd been there the whole time. So close by and yet Beca had been clueless. She found herself wishing that Chloe had just burst into her shower like before, but nothing was like before.


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N: Well, guys we are winding down. Chapter 9 is going to be the last one before the epilogue in ch. 10. I think you guys will like this one! Thanks so much to everyone who left feedback and to everyone who has followed along. You guys are the best.**

**"Guest: Miss, you've done it again. My heart is erratically beating. Well done :)"**

**Just wait! Thanks for your lovely comment.**

**Kylyn, thanks for your feedback and for dropping by to read.**

Opening night, time for the unwitting public to be exposed to the most uncomfortably performed play known to student theatre. Beca flipped through the script one last time before she got into her costume, which as it turns out was pretty close to what she wore every day. She glanced down the hall trying to spot Chloe but it seemed she was elsewhere. Beca bit her lip and checked her hair in the mirror.

In an hour the show would start and afterwards she would never have to hear the three songs that Aubrey had been forcing them perform again. It wasn't that Aubrey was a bad song writer or that the play itself was bad. It was the repetition. She had gone to sleep for the last week hearing the melodies and words march through her head like annoying little blonde soldiers demanding perfection that would obviously never come..

The real trouble began once she was asleep. That was when the dreams still came. Just like the one before Chloe was always just out of grasp. She had thought hard on it, on what conflict was happening within her that yielded such vivid and sad images.

* * *

A little voice kept telling her that it wouldn't work, that she shouldn't try, and that she didn't want to ruin a friendship. Then she reminded herself that that was the fear talking. She would see Chloe across the room and her heart would clench. Soon the excuses wouldn't be enough anymore. She just needed to close her eyes and jump off the cliff, trusting that she wouldn't suffer a traumatic emotional death if it didn't work out.

Rehearsing these scenes with Chloe and repeating the lines she had learned. They were all about Jack being in love with Ella when really she was just trying not to slip and say Chloe's name instead, to let her know that this wasn't just an performance. It wasn't her acting that had improved it was just her true feelings showing through. The more they were around each other professing the love that the characters felt; the more comfortable she began to come with the idea of deviating from the script and saying it for real.

* * *

Across the backstage area Chloe was doing her makeup and trying not to think about what they were about to do. Going on stage always made her nervous but this was worse. Instead of stomach churning excitement she was feeling apprehensive dread.

The show had come together better than she thought it would. They had all learned their parts pretty quickly and the songs even sounded great but they still hadn't nailed that last scene where Ella and Jack had their first kiss. In truth, they hadn't gotten to the kiss in rehearsal again, something that had driven Aubrey insane. Each time it came up they both just seemed to find an excuse to take a break or an interruption would save them from their eventual fate.

She had noticed how Beca had been a little more emotionally forthcoming in their scenes in the last few days and she hoped that they could just get the play done and move on because it was like torture. Aubrey could get her passing grade and they could all get on with their lives.

On the other hand, Jesse had been acting a little suspicious and she noticed that he seemed to always leave her alone with Beca between scenes and on breaks. When Beca had let it drop subtly that they had broken up she had felt some momentary joy but she quickly turned it off because being happy about someone else's misfortune made her feel terrible. However, neither of them seemed too upset about it so she let it go.

The stage manager, or Idiot Face as Aubrey had called her earlier in the week, came through the hall and passed Chloe. "Five minutes to vocal warm up. Everyone gather back by costumes!" Chloe sighed and prepared to come face to face with everyone for the last time before they went on.

* * *

They gathered in a circle and started vocal warm up, which was quite intimate since there were so few of them. Beca glanced up at Chloe every few seconds to gage her mood. She looked fine but if she was as nervous as Beca felt then she had to be shaking inside. They continued running through arpeggios and building cords until they all felt comfortable. When they were done Chloe met Beca's eyes and smiled. They were in this together after all.

The moment was over when the rest of the crew joined them for their little backstage ritual. Leigha, the lighting guru nudged Beca and winked when she walked up to stand beside her. Beca cleared her throat and smiled awkwardly in return.

She had noticed that Leigha seemed to always find her in a crowd. "Break a leg, Half Pint," she said in her broad Irish accent. "And let me know if you'd like to accompany me to the after party." She winked again before turning her attention to the group. Beca flushed red and tried to focus on anything other than what just happened.

By the time they broke apart Idiot Face was announcing five minutes until curtain. Chloe and Jesse lined up for their entrance into the first scene and Beca watched them, admiring the ease of their interaction. Then they were gone, first one and then the other. She turned away and listened to their dialogue, appreciating the sweet sound of Chloe's voice as they burst into their duet.

She opened her eyes and saw Idiot Face approaching with widened eyes. Apparently, she was about to miss her cue. She turned and waited a split second before walking semi-casually on stage, trusting that she would know what to do once she got there. Thankfully, muscle memory set in and she spoke just as the light hit her.

* * *

Forty minutes later and Jesse was on stage doing his monologue. Chloe and Beca waited in the wings for their last scene, the big scene to begin. They stood side by side, shoulders almost touching. Chloe glanced over and took in Beca's profile. "We can do this. It's just a kiss, right?"

Beca looked over, surprised that she had spoken. Her face was shaded by shadows as she fought hard to find the right words. This was the part that she was terrible at because she always felt inadequately prepared to soothe anyone's worries.

"We're going to be fine," she cleared her throat and turned to face Chloe, taking her hands. Chloe blinked in surprise and felt herself being pulled towards her counterpart. Beca was going to be brave, she had to be... for both of them. "Chloe, I..." She suddenly heard Jesse's footsteps approaching and the music changing for the last scene.

Beca let out a frustrated sigh. "I need to tell you something really important but I guess it has to wait until after we nail this scene." She smiled and stood aside letting Chloe enter the scene first and then took a big gulp and followed her.

* * *

"love is love

and I can't do this

without you there to hold me

There's no me without you

Let me show you,

and help you see

Just what you mean to me

With this kiss,

I'll say it all"

It was time, Beca held onto Chloe as tightly as she could and started deep into blue. She put it all out there, the month of frustrated back and forth and the dam of emotion that had broken inside her when she gave in. She was letting herself love Chloe, on stage in front of everyone she cared about.

She saw something of realization in Chloe's eyes and she clung to that, squeezing her hands. Trying with even more vehemence to tell her in Jack's words what it meant to be here with her no matter how long it had taken for her to realize that it was worth it. She wanted the experience, she craved the closeness, and she just wanted to ask if Chloe was there with her, if they could jump off the cliff together.

The song ended and she whispered her last line of dialogue before her lids fluttered shut and she leaned in to finally seal the borrowed but true words with her lips. "I love you." she said, just loudly enough so that the small audience could hear the barest edge of her annotation.

Chloe's body felt like light was beaming through it. She was not aware of the audience anymore. she felt fear and doubt leave her. Beca was telling her, everything she needed to know if she could just catch it all. This was making a memory or a stamp on time. She felt the small fists of Beca's love pounding on her heart and she closed her eyes and leaned in to allow it to enter her.

They kissed and it was nothing like either of them had imagined. It wasn't just the feeling of soft skin and warmth. It was the removal of corporal awareness. The tactile sensations were removed by the spark of each nerve ending as it fired until they had no idea where they were. Beca's tongue slid along Chloe's lips and she opened up to further exploration. The soft, wetness heightened the experience further, making it impossible for them to break apart unless acted upon by an outside force.

It came in the form of applause. At first just a smattering of sound waves being pushed at them and then a thunderous wall of clapping beating against the island they had created onstage. Beca broke the embrace first leaning back to look into Chloe's transformed features. They glowed together like a beacon of transcendental emotion. Chloe pressed her forehead to Beca's and held the last fortification of their defining moment before turning to the audience and pulling them both into a bow, bound by their linked hands.

Jesse joined them, then Aubrey, and then the crew. They each took their turn collecting their accolades and then one last time Beca and Chloe stepped forward to bow before leaving the stage, each one offering the other up to the appreciation of the crowd in turns.

Then, they were backstage grinning at each other, a little apart from the rest of the crew. "Did you mean that," Chloe asked, "What Jack said on stage."

Beca pulled Chloe into her and slowly leaned in until they mirrored their earlier positions on stage. "Those weren't Jack's words to Ella," she pressed a light kiss onto Chloe's lips and pulled back. "That was me telling you..." She looked up making sure that her words would reach their intended target. "that I love you and I want to be with you."

The words shot like an arrow straight to Chloe's heart, lighting it with their veracity. It was finally over, the pain of avoidance and repression. She felt the string that had been attached to that arrow stretch from Beca's heart to her own connecting them in a new way. She hoped that it would never break.


End file.
